1. Introduction
   1. Rationale

When it comes to love and relationships, ideologically, everyone is equal. However, reality hits particularly in marriage; homosexual individuals are put at a disadvantage, especially in having the courage to confess their feelings to straight individuals. These concerns were rarely narrated or explored, as most of the studies, such as Tiglao (2024), Galanza (2024), and Aguilar (2022), among others, focused on the “coming out” experiences and “discriminations” faced by the male gay individuals.

Mainstream media depicts the struggles of male gay characters in expressing their affection; hence, situations and scripts were mostly based on observations, not on scientific or research-based methods, which delimit real representations and struggles of male gays. This study may contribute how specific representations of male gay individuals should be represented and how these experiences seemed common and accepted, yet unexplored for research or academic pursue.

Some states, like Australia, America, and advanced societies, recognized the rights for equal love that were guaranteed in their constitutions. There were also some movements and rally fighting for the rights and anti-discriminations into different forms of love. Hence, despite these efforts, the LGBTQIC+ were limited in who they should love, especially in highly conservative countries.

In Asia, there are only two countries legalized the same-sex marriage – Taiwan and Thailand; hence, Manalastas et.al (2017) and Pew Research Center (2023), claimed that in the Japan, Vietnam, Thailand, HongKong, Cambodia, and India have a strong acceptance to same sex relationships and the Philippines. Although acceptance is present, but the idea of it and practices how gay individuals fully accepted, their experiences in finding real relationship, was under explored. The LGBTQIC+ in general, has still facing struggles and discriminations. The idea of majority, they are still laughingstock for entertainment and they are source of money, instead of fully accepted like a heterogenous relationship, as observed, since there were limited studies on how LGBTQIC+, specifically the male gay individuals, are viewed and with the rampant male sex workers, it only promote that these individuals are after sex as a pleasure, not for a long time commitment with love and care. They are mostly taken advantaged and prone for financial exploitation (Heissen & Hermann, 2020). This has been a phenomenon underexplored in the context of the Philippine society. Majority are focusing on portrayals, acceptability, and perception on the same-sex marriage, not taking a closer look on how members of LGBTQIC+ communities are struggling in the trap and dogma of one-sided love due to their gender identity.

With the premises stated above, this study would like to explore the phenomena on how the “Disney gay princess” which was referring to openly gay male individuals has been trapped in the idea of true love with a straight guy. It also discovered what were the factors that they encountered which served as the “villains” into the woods (referring to the society), revealing that these individuals could have a happy ending like real disney princesses, if the social construct about gays will be truly reversed, not by a curse or cure, but with a true love kiss or acceptance, that they should not be taken advantage of and be ridiculed due to their identity, and anybody may accept them as who they are not based on what they are capable to give and provide.

1. 2. Statement of the Problem

This study aimed to find out the lived experiences of male gay individuals in falling in love with straight guys. It explored the complexities of feelings, self-expression, and romantic relationships of gays in modern society.

Specifically, it explored the factors that served as the “villains” in the “woods” or reality, in attaining genuine love and relationships with straight male individuals. The trap, as referred to in the study, was the social situations that may have controlled how gay individuals encountered difficulties in attaining relationships, as discerned from the participants' narratives.

1. 3. Theoretical and Conceptual Framework

This study did not adapt theoretical underpinnings, as this was anchored with a descriptive phenomenological approach. Based on Husserl's perspectives, the aims of this approach were to explore human experiences without limitation, rather than proving or disproving theories. The study aimed to describe the lived experiences of the participants as they perceive them directly. The phenomena explored was the how gay male individuals were being trapped into falling in love with straight male individuals – their challenges and struggles in disclosing their feelings and how it was interpreted by the straight male; thus, why it would be hard for them as “Disney princesses” to find a true love due to the “villains” into the wood, or the social construct about to whom they should love freely and loudly, of course, with acceptance.

1. 4. Review of Literature and Studies

This study used the progressive iterative engagement review with the available literature related to the topic to avoid bias or exploration of narratives of the lived experiences of gay male individuals in falling in love with straight males. There were only limited studies related to the focus of this paper, which the paper explored from 2010 to 2025.

Falling in love with straight-identifying men is a complex and often challenging experience for gay men, one that has been explored across several fields—including psychology, sociology, and cultural studies. The research reveals a recurring pattern: these attractions tend to be emotionally intense and often end in disappointment. There’s an internal battle going on—a mix of hope, dented self-worth, and a constant negotiation of agency. Researchers such as Anderson (2016), Chen (2019), and Morales (2019) discussed how these emotional highs and lows were not merely personal quirks, but rather responses to broader social conditions.

Structural factors, especially heteronormativity and stigma, play a serious role here. Barker et al. (2018) and Ruiz (2020) demonstrate how these forces restricted the possibilities for same-sex desire to be reciprocated or even safely expressed. For many gay men, this means that falling for straight men is not just more common, but also more psychologically taxing. There’s a sense of longing and secrecy that runs through these stories—what some describe as “hidden courtship.” Lopez (2017) and Nguyen (2021) highlighted this dynamic, noting how it can lead to unequal power relations and a disproportionate amount of emotional labor for the gay partner. Research by Martinez & Silva (2022), and O’Neil (2020) showed that apps and online spaces often muddy the waters further. Ambiguous signals and performative heterosexuality can lead to misunderstandings, fueling hope where there may be none, and reinforcing cycles of unreciprocated pursuit of romantic relationships even among homosexual individuals. These experiences also have consequences for how gay men see themselves. Interactions with straight men can prompt intense “identity work,” as described by Patel (2015) and Yamada (2019). This might involve rethinking masculinity, choosing when and how to disclose one’s sexuality, or even reframing these attractions as fleeting phases. Many develop strategies to protect their emotional wellbeing.

Cross-cultural researches such Khan & Lee (2021) and Khan (2018) added another layer to it. In settings with strict heteronormative norms, secrecy and limited relationship options are more common. In more accepting environments, there may be more freedom to express desire, but the challenges of pursuing straight-identifying men remain.

To synthesize, the literature made it clear that gay men’s romantic attraction to straight men is not a single pathology or a simple personal choice. It emerged from a mix of personal longing, social pressures, digital environments, and ongoing identity negotiation.

2. Methodology
   1. Research Design

This study was phenomenological in nature as it focused on the exploration of human experience about the struggles in finding genuine relationships despite of their gender preferences and identities. The study provided an understanding to the meaning that participants provided in their experiences based on the discerned patterns in the responses they provided. In observation, homosexuals’ individuals were somehow fully acknowledged in the society; however, based on the portrayals in media and other institutions, it has been apparent that these people are facing inequalities, discriminations, and prejudices in engaging relationships with their same sex. Considering this situation, it would also be hard for these individuals to express their feelings to whom they admired and loved with in fear of rejection – these collective experiences as phenomena was explored that made this study used the descriptive phenomenological design. This design was appropriate to utilize as it tried to decode how society works and influence the experiences of the participants in getting their feelings out to get a happy ending for their love story. Hence, the answers provided were purely subjected to the point of view of the participants, as they have the direct experiences to the focus of the study.

The profound experiences of the participants were stated through the conversations and written narrative approach employed in this paper.

1. 2. Sampling Method

The methods that this study employed was Purposive Sampling as it identified some criteria in selecting the participants. The following considerations were made in the selection in the first stage of data collection among the participants of this paper: (1) Openly male gay individuals; (2) Experienced to confess their feelings to a straight guy; (3) Willing to participate in the study and share their stories; and, (4) Willing to be contacted for the possibility of follow-up interviews.

After the completion of the first stage, the second round was intended to select straight male individuals who were willing to participate in the study. A randomness approach was employed, and those who only responded to the publicly made link for the questionnaire were selected as the participants of the study. To provide in-depth data, the study compared the responses of the primary participants with those of the straight guys in the written follow-up questions.

1. 3. Data Collection

This study employed the triangulation method to gather data. There were three stages in the collection of data, the first stage involved the lived experiences of the male gay individuals in two forms – written and interviews. The second was the narrative perception of straight men into their acceptance on the possibility of homosexual relationships and how they might respond to someone who have disclosed their feelings to them. Then, those responses were compared and analyzed to find possible intersections and connections that will be basis for follow-up interviews.

The participants involved agreed upon that their responses and identity will be kept confidential, and the data will be stored for two years, the purpose of it was for validation. The personal information was not used in this paper instead code names were provided in each participant. No photos were taken, and every interview was off-the-record since they had provided narrative written responses before, and to ensure that there was no misinterpretation of their responses, the researchers mentioned the question twice and showed the participants the highlights or synthesis of what they had provided during the in-depth interviews.

1. 4. Data Analysis

The tools used for the analysis were the narrative analysis, based on the narrated lived experiences of the participants, and the themes and patterns were discerned and analyzed. The identified codes were compared and categorized to reveal specific themes from the participants' responses. To counter-check the identified themes, the responses without information about the respondents were presented to the intercoders, since both researchers have a background in linguistics, they agreed upon the codes and themes,

prior to presentation of them to the non-involved intercoder in the study. In this case, the qualitative data may be deemed reliable as researchers acting as intercoders, and the non-involved persona was included to identify codes and themes as well.

3. Results And Discussion

This section presents the results and analysis of the gathered data. Below is the profile of the ten gay male participants in the study.

Table 1. Participants’ Profile

All of the participants were still in the youth sector, and provided significant experiences regarding the acceptability and denial of feelings towards straight male individuals. Based on the profile and experiences of the participants, most of them experienced rejection but used it for personal growth, as G6 claimed, “I’ve been rejected many times, but I learned to love myself more.” In comparison, G10 and G 7 have their own ways to cope with the rejection as they provided humor and faith. As the latter said “itinatawa ko na lang, as it was part of being bakla”; this maturity response was also supported with the experience of G8.

Overall, the governing experiences of the participants focused on rejection, acceptance, and stigma surrounding the kind of love they were hoping for and aspiring to, as the younger participants were more likely to encounter mixed signals and were unable to confess due to fear of rejection.

On the other hand, based on the data gathered, the following themes had emerged in reference to the responses of the primary participants of the study.

Table 2. Decoded themes and codes for the Male Gay Individuals

The frequent themes that appeared were the Acceptance and Rejection (f=46), in which the feelings of gay individuals towards straight males could be accepted or rejected due to their identity, appearance, or circumstances of attraction.

Table 3. Decoded themes and codes for the Straight Male Individuals